Should You Let Your Teenager Attend High School Dances?

by KeeperAtHome | More from this Blogger

19 Feb 2007 10:13 AM

What is a high school dance? To a teenager, a high school dance is an opportunity for he or she to get together with their friends, listen to music, dance and have a good time. Dances are a time when relationships are formed between guys and girls. I still remember the high school dances I went to. I remember dancing with that certain guy who made my stomach jittery and my palms sweat. Conversely, I remember the pain of rejection when a guy I really liked never asked me to dance.

In a way, high school dances are a way in which teenagers come into their own. The outgoing rebels are in the front by the D.J., inevitably doing a juvenile form of a "mosh pit". The preppies and jocks are in the second ring of the dance floor, doing the cool moves. Next, the groups of girls without dance partners rock and sway as they look longingly at the second tier. And finally, though a bit tragically, the kids who just don't seem to fit in, line the walls, pop-can-in-hand, where the bleachers have been neatly tucked in for the dance. However, this scene, though it sounds familiar, is not all that is transpiring on today's high school dance floor.

Recently, a school district made the news for canceling all of the dances for the rest of the school year. The reason? Some students refused to stop doing a dance in which explicit sex acts were imitated. Other places around the country, certain types of dances are being banned, and in other areas, bans are badly needed. In some places, I've heard of school districts mandating that girls may not wear thong-style underwear to dances because there were cases of teenagers engaging in sex on the dance floor. Sound far fetched? Absolutely, but sadly, these things are occurring.

I believe that the combination of sexually-charged, emotional music, as well as teenagers that are running on hormones and looking for their first boyfriend, kiss or sexual encounter contributes to this atmosphere. I do not believe that these types of situations are occurring in every high school across the country, but it is alarming to me that the behavior of our nation's teenagers has gone so decidedly out of control. Many may say, "Well, we pushed the limits in our day too." I know that is true, but how far can the limits be pushed before high school dances become an all-out orgy? Call me reactionary, but the heavy rock music and sexual attitudes that prevail at high school dances are not something to which I would be willing to expose my teenager.

When I was in high school, in a school district for a town of 3,000 people, I remember some fellow-classmates coming to dances under the influence of drugs and alcohol. Yes, oftentimes students did get caught and were disciplined, but just as often, they did not.

I have moral objections to high school dances for several reasons, including the style of music, the sexual behavior it invites, and the exposure it gives students to substance abuse. Call me a prude, but the Bible says that we are to be wise concerning the things of God and simple concerning evil.

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Belle0305 (540) 27 Feb 2007 10:21 PM

Gosh...I have two girls and I am trying to prepare my self for the road ahead. I totaly agree with you, kids get so caught up in the emotions and music and morals and values taught at home are long forgotten.

Leees (5) 18 Nov 2008 01:53 PM

I think it is very important to talk regularly to your kids. My kids would come to me if these behaviors were going on in their school and I would be all over the school board and principal. Of course it is to note that most of the members of the school board are the chaperones and we have a school with very high parent involvement. Sometimes it is very overwhelming to be a highly involved parent when you must work full time and have other kids, but in the long run (in our community) it seems to be working. I have gotten to know the other parents and the communication is very open. I hate to take something fun away from these kids that should be good, clean, and a positive experience. It is a strange school compared to mine though-the whole grade dances together in a group. So the rejection is not there and the kids all feel positive and get some exercise. I guess I am just lucky.

Valorie Delp (49340) 18 Nov 2008 03:18 PM

Um. . .yeah. i'd say so. You have described something that doesn't exist in most parts of the us

MasterBackAdder (6) 30 May 2009 10:28 PM

Because, you know, this happens all the time, and everywhere. I don't know where you got your information, but I do not believe that kids actually had intercourse on the floors. I think you're being over reactive to say that we're closing in on orgies on the dance floors as well. There are chaperons at these events and is also generally a security or police presence too. I think that you are just scared of what kids are learning, preparing themselves to become adults. Kids are having sex without protection do to abstinence only sex ed, and the "grind" dancing is just a result of having to learn sex on their own. If you think the things that go on in 2009 are bad, you clearly have no idea what school life in the 1960's and 1970's were like. My parents, and my Grandfather have told me stories that would likely make you cry.