How to Make Friends- part 2

by Dale Harcombe | More from this Blogger

24 Mar 2008 07:26 PM

In my last blog I said,'friends listen to my joys and problems and I listen to theirs and support them in prayer. It's reciprocal.'

Reciprocal

On that subject, sometimes it's happened where I have met someone, we have a common interest and I think in time we could be good friends, but it never happened. We stay at an acquaintance level that never grows into friendship. Why?

It could be that person is not looking to make more friends. Perhaps they have enough friends in their lives. Or perhaps there is something in my personality that grates on them? Or they have other reasons for keeping at arm's length? When this happens there is nothing to do but accept the fact, move on but don't let it stop me from reaching out to others in friendship in future.

Honesty

A friend is someone you can be honest with. We do not need to pretend to be something we're not. This also means that sometimes friends will tell us the truth, even if we don't want to hear it, because it is for our own good. How do you handle honest criticism? Do you get your back up and become defensive or realize it is often because the person cares about you that they feel they can tell you the truth. Take it as a compliment that they trust your character enough to be able to deal with the truth and accept honest criticism.

Sometimes that honesty might include being able to tell you when it is not a good time to talk etc because they are too busy.

Not expect too much.

Know when enough is enough and when to leave people alone or back off. Don't be always on the phone or calling in uninvited. Give them space. Respect other people's time and privacy. The quickest way to kill a friendship is to abuse it by ringing, dropping in too often till the person feels smothered by attention. This can bring a quick end to friendship.

Time

Sometimes friendships take time to grow. Others spring up like a seedling and before you know it they have grown into a sizeable plant that brings great blessing in our lives.

I like this quote from John Hay which is on my calendar. 'Friends are the sunshine of life.' Let's live in the sunshine.

Or this from Ralph Waldo Emerson. 'A friend is the hope of the heart.' If you have a friend who is important, tell them so. Sometimes just knowing someone else cares and is in prayer can brighten a person's day.

Please visit these related blogs

How to make a friend

Holy huddles or reaching outwards?

Standing out for all the wrong reasons

Learn more about Dale Harcombe

Dale has a passion for books and writing. She writes in various forms, from articles to poetry to fiction for children and adults.

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