Beware of Sending the Wrong Signals at Church

by Dale Harcombe | More from this Blogger

14 Jan 2009 12:07 PM

Recently I saw how easily people can send the wrong signals to others at church.

After church we meet together in the hall, verandah s set up with tables and chairs and in the grounds of the church under the shady trees, to share a cup of tea or coffee and talk. This is a valuable time for getting to know people. Sadly, some people don't take advantage if it. As soon as church is over they are out the door and into their car, giving people no chance to befriend them or get to know them.

Another situation I saw recently was the person on his own. He stood on the veranda looking out, with his back towards most people. At the time I became aware of him on his own, I was engaged in an interesting conversation with someone that I don't often get to talk to. It wasn't easy to disentangle myself, without appearing rude, to go over and talk to the person on his own.

By the time I could, he'd already walked to the car and was on his way out of the car park. That saddened me. It prompted me to think about what he could have done differently to make friends.

1. Go to church regularly, rather than just turn up every now and then.

2. Stand facing people rather than turned away from them.

3. Stand a little way away from a group of people but close enough that they will invite you in. They usually will.

4. Show you are interested in others by smiling at them.

5. Tell the minister or musicians something you enjoyed or found interesting about the service.

6. Make the first move and talk to someone else who is standing on their own or looking lost.

7. Offer to help with morning tea or some other activity that needs doing.

In our local paper a reporter asked kindergarten children. 'How do you make friends with someone?'

'You talk to them and respect them and let them play on the monkey bars with you,' one boy said.

Okay so we don't have monkey bars at church, but the other two suggestions are good.

Another child said, 'you be kind and ask politely.' A third said 'Smile at them and play with them.'

See how easy it is for children to make friends. Maybe we adults need to be more like them.

Please visit these related blogs

Why Go to Church?

How to Make a Friend

Welcome or Not?

Opening up to Others.

Learn more about Dale Harcombe

Dale has a passion for books and writing. She writes in various forms, from articles to poetry to fiction for children and adults.

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